Song of a dove
Chapter 1
As Jessica walked up the steep trail, tears were flowing from her eyes down her face. Occasionally, she sobbed and wiped the tears away. Jessica was thirty years old. Although not strikingly beautiful, she was very attractive, especially when excited and animated.
It was a beautiful spring day. Although just a bit chilly, the sky was blue and the sun was bright. There was a fragrance in the air from unseen blossoms. The birds were singing their various songs and the trees were that yellowish green that occurs every spring. Jessica did not notice the beauty and wonder of spring because she was engrossed in her own thoughts.
Finally, she reached the top of the hill. On one side was a stand of oak trees. Their branches covered most of the hilltop. On the other side of the hill was a shear cliff of at least a hundred feet. The bottom of the cliff had jagged stones that rose from the forest below. In the distance were other hills. The view was spectacular. Jessica was oblivious to the beauty of the hill.
Jessica walked to the very edge of the cliff. She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked down at the rocks below. She stared for several minutes. Many thoughts passed through her mind, but she knew what had to be done. Slowly she lifted her right foot and moved it over the edge of the cliff. There was only emptiness below her foot. All that she had to do was shift her weight to that foot and all of her problems would end.
She gave one last thought to this ultimate act but knew that it was the right thing to do. Just then, a beautiful white dove landed on her left shoulder. Jessica was both surprised and bewildered by this unexpected event. She put her right foot back on solid ground.
“Well aren’t you the most beautiful bird? Why did you land on my shoulder?”
To Jessica’s surprise, the dove answered, “Coo. Coo. Why do you want to end your life? You are very special! Why do you want to end your life?”
Jessica had never heard of a talking dove. “You can talk! What are you?”
“Coo. Coo. I’m just a dove. Why do you want to end your life?”
“What makes you think that I want to end my life?”
“Coo. Coo. You’re standing at the edge of a cliff. You were ready to jump. Why do you want to end your life?”
“Little dove, it’s a long story. Do you really want to hear it?”
“Coo. Coo. I have no other place to be. And neither do you. Tell me your story. I want to hear it. Please!”
Jessica backed away from the edge of the cliff and sat on a comfortable rock under one of the oak trees. There were still tears in her eyes as she started to tell her story.
“After graduating from business college, I got a job at MacDonald Consulting as an assistant troubleshooter. I worked with an experienced consultant named Gerald. I thought that he was wonderful. He showed me how to turn my education into a practical art. We went into businesses and helped them turn a loss into a profit. We made the businesses work. It was such satisfying work and the business owners were so thankful for our help.
“It wasn’t long before I fell in love with Gerald. I moved in with him and we had sex almost every night. He made me so happy. Each day we went to work together and came home together. I made supper and he really enjoyed my cooking. The only thing that could have made it better was if we were married, and then we could have children together.”
“Coo. Coo. Did he want to get married?”
“No, he said it wasn’t the right time.
“After a few years, he was promoted to supervisor and I was assigned to charitable organizations. I worked alone after that. But I was not ready to work alone. Gerald had to cover for my mistakes and prevent the clients from getting angry. I am not sure what I was doing wrong, but Gerald always covered for me. At night, he told me that the only reason that I still had my job was because of our relationship. He assured me that he would protect me.”
“Coo. Coo. Did he ever tell you what you were doing wrong, so that you could correct your mistakes?”
“No, he never told me. I asked him, from time to time, but he never told me.”
Jessica started crying and sobbing. The dove just sat on her shoulder and waited patiently for her to regain her composure.
“Last night, he came home late. He told me that he had found a new girlfriend. He gave me fifteen minutes to pack up my stuff and leave. He told me not to come to work because I was fired. And he said that if I used him or the company as a reference, he would tell them that I was a bad worker. He told me that I was worthless and that nobody would want me for anything, not even sex. I moved into a cabin that belongs to a friend.”
Jessica started crying again. After a few minutes, she continued.
“I have nothing to live for. I’ll never get another good job. No man will ever want me and I’ll never get married. I’ll never find happiness again. And I’m worthless. The sooner I die, the less I will suffer.”
Jessica started bawling, uncontrollable. The dove just sat on her shoulder.
When Jessica finally stopped crying, the dove spoke.
“Coo. Coo. You are not worthless and you have done great things in your life. During our lives, we come into contact with many people. In most cases, our contacts are neutral, have no substantial effect upon those people. Sometimes our contacts are negative, where people are hurt by having met us and sometimes we make a positive difference in people’s lives.
“Coo. Coo. Do you remember the day when you were in the second grade and saw a little boy playing near the road as you were walking to school? You brought the boy into the house.”
“I remember. I got a detention for being late for school. That darned little kid!”
“Coo. Coo. You saved that boy’s life. Minutes later a truck’s brakes failed and crashed into a tree where the child was playing. You saved his life.”
“Really? How do you know?”
“Coo. Coo. I was there! That boy just finished college. He is going to be an engineer. Do you remember when you were in high school, you met Junko?”
“She was a Japanese girl whose father had a temporary job in the United States. She was so sad and lonely. She could barely speak English and the bullies laughed at her. Her parents were too busy and she had nobody. I remember seeing her in the cafeteria where she was alone and crying. I introduced her to my friends and she was happy until she returned to Japan. I wonder how she’s doing today.”
“Coo. Coo. She’s very happy today, because of you. She was going to end her life that night. But because of your kindness, she is happy today. Of the hundreds of students in your school, you were the only one who cared.”
“How do you know?”
“Coo. Coo. I was there! Do you remember the day when you driving to school and you saw a woman fall and hit her head?”
“You should have seen the bump on her head. I stopped and check on her. She told me that she was dizzy. I gave her a ride to the hospital. I wonder what ever happened to her. I didn’t even get her name.”
“Coo. Coo. She walked into the hospital and collapsed. They rushed her into surgery and saved her life. Five minutes later and she would have died. She has a husband and three children. You saved her life!”
“I didn’t know. I didn’t know.”
Jessica was shocked by the revelation from this strange talking dove.
“Coo. Coo. You are really a very special person. You saved the lives of three people, just because you are a kind person. Why would you want to die?”
“I am worthless today. I cannot do my job. I have no friends. I have no future.”
“Coo. Coo. Where are you staying now that you are not with Gerald?”
“A friend lent me her cabin.”
“Coo. Coo. Then you have at least one friend. I’ll bet you have many friends. A person would be lucky to have you as a friend.”
“I guess you are right. I do have some friends, some really good friends. But I cannot do my job. Gerald had to cover for me with every job I did. I messed up every job that was given to me.”
“Coo. Coo. What about the Boston Home for Lost Children? They were preparing to close because of lack of money. You straightened out their books and they are doing better than ever. Your efforts helped hundreds of children.”
“Yes, I did get them back into business. But that was just one case. What about my other cases?
“Coo. Coo. You saved the Newton Society for the Blind. You helped hundreds of blind people. You did it and you should be proud.”
“Yes, I did help them. But, what about all the other cases?”
“Coo. Coo. Can you show one case where you failed?”
“Well, Gerald told me that he had to cover for my failures. He saved my job time after time.”
“Coo. Coo. Didn’t Gerald tell you that he loved you? Would he have walked out on you if he loved you? If he lied to you about something this important, how can you be sure that he ever told the truth to you? Maybe he lied to you from the day you met. How can you be so sure?”
Jessica was so perplexed and confused that she did not know what to say. She just sat there, staring into the distance. The dove sat quietly on her shoulder while she considered all that had been said. After several minutes, she stood up and walked toward the cliff, but stayed a safe distance from the edge.
“Dove, little dove, what is my future? You know my past, my present, what is my future?
“Coo. Coo. I cannot say. Nobody can. Many factors control your future. Other people shape your future. Chance affects your future. Even the weather affects your future. But what has the greatest effect upon your future is you. You’ve made mistakes in your life, but those mistakes give you wisdom. With wisdom, you can avoid those mistakes and ….”
“Make a whole batch of new mistakes!”
“Coo. Coo. Yes, you will make more mistakes, but that’s what makes us human, or at least you human. You will make mistakes and you will learn from them. Maybe you will help others to avoid your mistakes. A kind person does that.”
“Perhaps you’re right. But I have no job and Gerald will prevent me from ever getting another job. What will I do?”
“Coo. Coo. Live each day, one at a time. Sometimes, things happen very slowly, but sometimes your life can change in minutes, for better or worse. You can only guess what will happen tomorrow. Only when your life ends is there really no hope.”
Jessica returned to the rock where she had been sitting. Everything that the dove said seemed so obvious and yet it had not occurred to her. She was not aware that she had saved the lives of three people, nor had she realized how many people were helped through her work. But she knew that there was hope and yet she was ready to end her life. She was perplexed by the events of the morning, but she realized that she was about to make a big mistake at the moment that the dove landed on her shoulder.
“Dove, little dove, thank you so much. You saved my life. How can I thank you?”
“Coo. Coo. Have a good life. We will meet again. Goodbye Jessica.”
“Goodbye little dove. Goodbye.”
The dove flew into the crisp blue sky and disappeared in the distance. Jessica walked down the long steep trail to the cabin where she had been staying. There was an overpowering sense of optimism as she descended the trail. Unlike earlier that day, she smelled the blossoms from distant trees and marveled at the beauty of the springtime morning. After coming so close to death, her surroundings seemed much more important and she enjoyed the beauty as never before.
Chapter 2
As Jessica approached her house, she noticed a man in a business suit and brief case waiting at her door. She approached the man. “Can I help you?” The man turned and Jessica recognized him. “Mr. MacDonald! What are you doing here?”
“Jessica, I’d like you to come back to work. You have some important clients waiting for you.”
“Gerald fired me yesterday.”
“And I fired Gerald this morning. You are my best employee and I don’t want to loose you. Are you hungry? Would you like to have lunch with me?”
“Mr. MacDonald, I ….”
“Call me David.”
“Okay, David, I haven’t eaten since yesterday. I’m starving!”
Jessica and David went to a small restaurant and sat at a quiet corner. Since it was before eleven, there were few diners. After ordering hamburgers and fries, David took some papers out of his brief case and handed them to Jessica.
“Jessica, I found these in Gerald’s desk. I think that you will find them interesting.”
Jessica looked at the letters. They were from her clients, praising her for her work.
“Gerald told me that my work was poor and that he was covering for me. These letters seem to contradict what he told me.”
“He was a bad man and I am glad that I had a reason for getting rid of him.”
Jessica thumbed through the letters. Occasionally, she smiled when she saw a letter from a client that was dear to her. The waitress brought their meal and Jessica put the papers aside.
“David, I just never expected this. It means so much to me that all of these people praised my work. It means more than you can imagine.”
As Jessica ate, or more accurately devoured, her hamburger, David’s expression became very serious. Jessica noticed the change but continued to eat.
“Jessica, the day that you came to my company, I fell in love with you. Everything about you, the way you look, the way you talk, the way you hold yourself, and most of all, that intrinsic kindness that radiates from you. I wanted to ask you out, to join me wherever I go. But I was afraid that you would be intimidated. And then you became involved with Gerald and I felt that it was too late.
“But things are different now. Jessica, I absolutely adore you and I want you to be part of my life. I hope that you do not consider my advances improper.”
They were both silent, as Jessica finished her hamburger. Finally, Jessica spoke. “Waitress, can I have another hamburger, please?” Then Jessica laughed as she looked at David. “I’m sorry. I’m just so hungry! David, I have always admired you, but I always felt that you were too good for me. There is nothing that I would like more than to be with you.”
Jessica took a few fries from David’s plate and David laughed.
“I am so happy to have my job back. I really love the work and it means so much to me that I am helping people.”
“Jessica, I am glad to have you back. I’m glad that you know how I feel about you. Can I take you out to dinner, to a nice restaurant?”
“I’d love that! And I’ll still be hungry!”
David laughed. Jessica’s second hamburger came and she ate it as she stared at David.
When she finished her meal, she asked David, “How did you know that I was at that cabin, deep in the woods?”
“I went to some of the people in the office and asked where you were. Susan told me that you had been fired and that you were at her cabin. I looked for you and I was about to leave when you came down the trail. Did you take a nice hike?”
David observed a strange look on Jessica’s face.
“It was interesting, very interesting!”
“Let me take you home so that you can get dressed for tonight. I have to go back to work. You need a day off, once in a while, so enjoy yourself.”
When they got back to the cabin, David said, “I’ll pick you up at six, okay?”
Jessica smiled, “See you then.”
After David drove away, Jessica went into the cabin, lied down on the bed and fell asleep. The last twenty-four hours had been both physically and emotionally draining and now she needed some sleep.
Chapter 3
Jessica awoke just before five. “I only have an hour before David comes! I have to get ready!”
Jessica washed and then looked for a good dress. She wanted to look her best when David came. When she finally found her best dress, she brushed her hair. As she brushed, she noticed a small white feather. She put it in a safe place and continued to prepare for her special date.
At ten minutes of six, she sat outside the cabin. At exactly six, David drove to the front door. The story of Cinderella came to mind. David stopped the car, got out, and opened the door for her. She could not remember one time when Gerald showed her that little courtesy. David treated her like a princess.
When they arrived at the restaurant, they were given a quiet table where they could talk. As Jessica sat down, David moved her chair under her. David asked Jessica to make a selection from the menu and then he ordered for both of them. David ordered a bottle of wine which they shared as they waited for their meal.
“Jessica, is everything fine? Is there anything that you want?”
Jessica had never been treated with such respect, certainly not by Gerald.
“David, do you take many women to this restaurant?”
“That’s quite a question! I have taken other women to this restaurant, but you are very special. This is the best restaurant in town and I want only the beat for you.”
“David, I barely know you and you seem to know me very well. It seems strange.”
“Yes, it feels strange to me, but I have dreamed of this day since you started working at my company. I’m sorry if it makes you feel uncomfortable.”
Jessica smiled. During their meal, they talked about their childhood, their days in college, and their hopes and dreams. Every little thought was so exciting to reveal. The waiter came and cleaned the table. He said that the restaurant was about to close.
Jessica smiled and looked at the clock, “Where did the evening go? I’ve had so much fun talking to you.”
“I’d better bring you home. You have to get up early tomorrow so that you can go to work. You can’t be late. The boss will be mad at you!”
“David, let’s not tell anybody about us. Okay?”
“Okay!”
David brought Jessica to her cabin. He stopped the car, got out, and opened the door for Jessica. Jessica started walking toward the cabin, turned around, went back to David, and kissed him.
“Good night, David. Thank you for a wonderful evening.”
“Good night, Jessica. Thank you for a wonderful evening, and thank you for being Jessica.”
Jessica went into the house, took off her dress and went to bed. As she lay in bed, she thought what a wonderful day this had been. And then a shudder went through her body. If she had shifted her weight, she would be dead now. Her body would be lying at the bottom of the cliff, maybe undiscovered for days. It seemed inconceivable that she was so close to taking her own life and yet it really happened. It seemed to her like a dream, or more accurately, a nightmare.
Jessica wondered about the dove, the dove that saved her life. Was it real, or was it her imagination? Was it her guardian angel, or was it the angel of death? Whatever it was, it saved her life and she was grateful.
Chapter 4
The next morning, Jessica went to work as usual, but to her it seemed as if she had been away for a week or more. Everything seemed different and yet everybody was going about their work as normal. Jessica had a new start.
Susan walked up to Jessica. “How is the cabin? I hope that it’s okay.”
“It’s wonderful! Can I stay for a few months?”
“Of coarse. I haven’t used it for over a year. It’s good having somebody make it lived in. The cabin has almost no heat, except for the fireplace. You’d better find a place by late autumn, otherwise, you’ll be very cold. Jessica, I hope that you don’t mind that I told Mr. MacDonald that you were there.”